You don't have to be a writer to think, "Someday I'd like to...." Well stop putting it off! There's no time like the New Year to make resolutions that you have a chance to keep.
Stop smoking? Lose weight? Find your soul mate? Pfft. If you want a real challenge, check out my Top 5 Resolutions for Writers in 2016.
1. Write a book. I don't mean start writing a book. Anyone can start. Write a full book from start to finish. NaNoWriMo is a great place to start. Don't wait for November. They have camps in both April and July that can help you kick off your next novel.
2. Join a writing group. This will help a lot with the first resolution in this list. My writing group not only helps me stay on track with my writing goals, but they also challenge me to write outside my comfort zone which improves my writing. Check on sites like Meetup, or if all else fails start your own.
3. Attend a conference. If possible, attend with members of your writing group. You will learn a lot and it will give you something to bond over at future meetings. You will also get the opportunity to network with other people (both authors and readers) in the writing industry. Two of my favorites are the MAFWI conference and Bouchercon, which is geared toward the mystery genre.
4. Build your social networking platform. If you're not ready to go public with a Facebook author page, then consider building up your Twitter followers. Develop a routine of following 10 new authors or publishers per day. If 10% of the these people follow you back, then by this time next year you'll have over 350 new followers! And when you are ready to develop your Facebook account, then you can link it so your posts also show up on Twitter.
5. Hire an editor. It's the best thing I ever could have done and my first book, a collection of short stories titled HAUNTED WOMEN OF THE APPALACHIANS is so much better for it. What you pay an editor is an investment. Learn more about my editor, Sheila Haab, on her website.
Here's to a New Year filled with lots of literary progress!
What are your writing resolutions for 2016? I'd love to hear about them in the comments section!
Christmas is the season of forgiveness, but I'm here to tell you it's not easy. Take a look at any social media network and you'll find groups of people who are offended by everything from skin color to use of a certain phrase. While I am first to preach tolerance, there are some things that seem pretty unforgivable!
For example, I am not sure I can forgive LeAnn Rimes for butchering one of my favorite songs. "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" was fine just the way it was. There was certainly no reason for her to add a country twang and double the pace.
Another example of something that seems unforgivable is when someone tells a lie that involves my kids. Treat me like crap if you must, but please do not drag my boys into it. They are not angels by any stretch, but they are my angels and nobody's going to lie about them.
And finally, let's talk about pictures of me on social media. I'm not a huge fan. It's taken me six years since first creating my Facebook account to be comfortable enough to post a selfie. When I find other people have posted them, I have a little meltdown bemoaning all my flaws to my husband, who patiently and lovingly suffers through it. Every. Single. Time. (Because after all, the photo on my book jacket will be much more flattering.)
Now that I've given some examples of seemingly unforgivable acts, look at them from the point of view of a character in a book.
A musician hears a remake of his song on the radio, and plots his revenge.
A neighbor lies about kids traipsing through her flower beds to hide the fact that a feral cat colony living in the crawlspace under her home is the real culprit.
A photographer posts a photo of a political figure online acting suspicious to social media and, as a result, winds up stalked by members of the mafia.
In each of the above situations, the character wields quite a bit of power. They can forgive or not, and that will weigh heavily on the outcome of your story. Just like whether or not I forgive people will affect the outcome of my story. I'm trying to come to terms with the second and third items on my list, but LeAnn Rimes will never hold a candle to Gayla Peevey when it comes to my favorite Christmas song!
Have you given your characters the chance to forgive anyone? Were any of their situations inspired by things in your life? Let's chat about it in the comments section below!
After attending the Mid-Atlantic Fiction Writers conference in August, 2015, I was on my way to take possession of a rescued crested gecko when I got the idea to write a cozy mystery that would delve into some of Blackbeard's history.
I'm about 2/3 of the way into the book and the worst thing happened. I lost focus. For a few weeks my book stayed closed. The pages began gathering dust. Terrible thoughts entered my head, like: Should I scrap what I have and rewrite everything in limited first-person point of view?
In case you're wondering, I posed that to my fellow Mountain Scribes (my writing group) at our First Annual Christmas Party and the answer was a resounding, "No!"
Then two wonderful things happened. The first was that I confessed my fears to my friend David. He quoted lines from a NaNoWriMo Pep Talk by Neil Gaiman. Knowing that Neil Gaiman suffers from these same qualms actually made me feel a lot better.
The second thing happened when I was randomly looking at bits of analytical information from the Becky Muth Author Page on Facebook. When trying to decipher who in the world (literally, places like Nigeria and Las Vegas and Australia, even!) liked my page, I saw this:
There you have it. One of my fans speaks pirate. If knowing that Neil Gaiman suffers from "I'm not good enough"-itis wasn't enough, then having a fan who speaks pirate is more than plenty. Whoever you are, you pirate-speaking-fan of mine, than you. I so needed this.
Are you a writer who found confirmation in unlikely places? Do you feel like your train of thought derailed around Chapter 8 and you're not sure how to get back on track? Let me hear about it in the comments section. I'd love to talk about this with you!
Christmas time's a-coming! If there is a book lover on your list, then you might be wondering what to get them. Lucky for you--and anyone else in this predicament, book lovers are easy to please!
How could we not want to go above and beyond to reward book lovers for their happy-go-lucky nature when it comes to receiving presents? Here are some ideas for the book lover in your list:
Bookmarks - It might seem like the obvious choice, but we book lovers can't ever have too many bookmarks. I use mine in both books I'm reading, and notebooks I'm using to jot down ideas for my next writing project.
Book Light - Show me a book lover, and I will show you someone who stayed up reading past their bedtime. Clip-on book lights allow reading in the darkest of conditions, whether you clip it onto your book or your glasses.
Notebook - A book lover can use a notebook to write down thoughts about their favorite books. And a writer can never have too many notebooks--just sayin'!
Book Art - Sites like Etsy and Uncommon Goods offer unique gifts, a lot of which are handmade by up and coming artists. You can tickle the book lover in your life while simultaneously supporting creative arts.
Gift Cards - I have never known a book lover to turn down a gift card. In the past my family has given me cards for shopping at Amazon, coffee shops, and local bookstores, and I've enjoyed them all with equal enthusiasm.
Travel Mug - It's easy to get lost in a good book, but important to stay hydrated. A travel mug helps solve the problem and if it gets knocked over then the lid means the mug's contents are less likely to spill on the pages.
Warm Blanket - Last year my mother-in-law gave me a blanket for Christmas. It is not only dog-themed, but it is also made from the warmest fleece I have ever felt in my life. When I curl up on the couch to read on a chilly evening, you can bet I have my blanket with me.
And there you have it! It is no coincidence that writers are also book lovers. If you have a writer on your holiday shopping list, then many of these ideas would work for them as well.
Do you have a different idea not listed here? Tell me about it in the comments section below!
Anyone who writes 50k words within the 30-day time period (i.e. the already hectic month of November) is eligible to "win" NaNoWriMo. The site requires you to validate your novel by copying and pasting everything you've written into a magical box.
It's okay. Once your novel's validated the site forgets whatever it saw, so nobody's stealing your ideas. Besides, there are no original ideas. I mentioned (the highlighted, glossy parts of) an idea to a couple of friends in front of someone else who said, "Oh! So it's JUST like Shirley Jackson's THE LOTTERY?" Um, no, totally NOT like that. Kudos that she knew Shirley Jackson was the author, but I digress.
According to an array of reputable sources, including Writer's Digest, a novel in the genre of general literary fiction is somewhere between 85,000 and 100,000 words. Depending on your genre and intended audience though, your novel might be slightly longer or much shorter.
If you just finished NaNoWriMo for the first time, then you might be thinking, "But I wrote 50,000 words!" So you did. Good job! And now it's time to write the rest of the book.
While writing my current NaNoWriMo winner, a cozy mystery, ONE SQUASHED VICTORY, the characters revealed the ending scene, how the book will wrap up, and the plot for books two and three. But I still have about 27,000 words to go before I can say the first draft of the novel is really done.
Even after I write those words, there's still a lot to go as outlined in "Revisions, Bloody Revisions," a Midnight Ink blog post by Tracy Weber. Some authors the book, send it to the publisher, and from there it's on your shelf or e-reader. Tracy uses a 14-step process. Mine is at least 14. (Does she mention drinking copious amounts of wine and coffee while crying on the dog's shoulder because it's 3:30 A.M. and everyone else is asleep?)
So there you have it! While finishing up this book, HAUNTED WOMEN OF THE APPALACHIANS (my NaNoWriMo "win" for both 2013 and 2014) is on the verge of dropping into the hands of my benelovent beta readers. It's only slightly less terrifying as the day I put my sons on the school bus for the first time. Wish me luck!
Do you have any questions for me? Any comments on this topic? I'd love to discuss them with you in the comments section below!
Writing fiction is like therapy. I enter a virtual room (within my brain) where a group of people (my characters) sit in a circle and tell me their stories. Sometimes their stories intertwine, and sometimes their stories are standalone.
And sometimes, their stories imitate things from my life.
Let's look at Maggie Sawyer, for example. Unlike me, she's in her mid-30's and single. Her high school boyfriend has just re-entered her life, but they're not hooking up any time soon. Like me, Maggie has some issues, one of them being a parent with an explosive temper. (Boy do I know about that!)
When Art Imitates Life
It's no secret that artists create things that imitate life, and nothing makes art more appealing than a little tragedy. When I write, I slip the dark things from my life into my fictional works. It helps me confront them in a creative way.
Slipping those negative emotions into my fictional work also helps me take control of the details of the situation behind them. Sometimes I come up with a different outcome. Maybe even a better outcome.
Accepting the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Everyone has creative talents and I'm blessed with more than a few. During my quilting phase, I made memorial photo quilts. When on my knitting kick, I whipped up scarves and hats for the local cold weather coalition. And during my pen and ink era, I sketched pets that had crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.
Looking back, it's easy to see how I've spent my entire life using art to get past the rough times in life. Depression and the holidays go hand in hand, and the ugly black claws are already threatening to sink in. If this happens to you, then please reach out and talk to someone.
For now writing is doing the trick for me. Whenever a dark memory threatens to drag me down, instead of wallowing in it, I'm pulling out my notebook and jotting down details. Making poor Maggie Sawyer suffer along with me in her own, fictional way really does help.
If you're a writer, I'd love for you to chime in with your thoughts on this subject. And if you're a reader, then let me know how you tackle the tough times, through the holidays or otherwise.
Despite all the cozy series available through both online and retail book sellers, there are still a lot of people who have no idea what a cozy mystery is. Books authored by Agatha Christie are probably the best and most recognized examples of cozy mysteries.
Also called "cozies", a cozy mystery is a sub-genre of the larger one known as crime fiction or mystery. In a cozy mystery:
Sex is all but nonexistent. What happens in the bedroom stays there.
There's a lack of blood and gore. If it does feature, then it's downplayed.
The overall tone is light, if not lighthearted. There might be puns!
Crime typically takes place in a community or small town.
The sleuth is an amateur with ties to some brand of the law.
If cozy mysteries were television shows, then you'd most likely find them on the Hallmark channel or some equally family-friendly television programming station. Some good examples are Murder She Wrote, Pie in the Sky, the Father Dowling Mysteries, or Matlock, although the latter was a criminal defense lawyer and not an amateur sleuth.
As Lieutenant Columbo would say: Oh, just one more thing....
My cozy mystery for NaNoWriMo is coming along nicely. I'm slightly ahead of the curve as far as daily word counts, and look forward to completing the book so I can move on to the next phase of seeing it in print.
If you follow me on Facebook, then recently you might have noticed status updates like:
Today I poisoned someone, broke someone else's leg, and convinced someone to walk off with the keys to a cabinet holding a murder weapon. #WriterLife #BestJobEver
In case you're worried, I reconsidered the broken leg and gave the person a mild concussion and a bruised collarbone instead. But I digress.
November is National Novel Writing Month, otherwise known as NaNoWriMo. In 2012 and 2013, I wrote the first and second halves of HAUNTED WOMEN OF THE APPALACHIANS, a collection of thirteen fictional short stories inspired by authentic Appalachian lore.
Writing a Novel versus Writing a Short Story
This year I'm writing a cozy mystery, tentatively titled One Squashed Victory. The story takes place in the fictional town of Treasure Pines, North Carolina, about forty minutes west of the Outer Banks. The characters include:
The victim, who steals his neighbor's gourd and enters it into a contest
The amateur sleuth, who by day is a single librarian who isn't looking for love, but might find it despite her attempts to thwart it
The sleuth's private investigator brother who trusts the local police to find the real killer
Their dad, who is accused of the crime of killing his neighbor, the victim
A wannabee starlet who dresses as a pirate using eyeliner and his mother's yoga pants (He's in his 20's. It's not pretty. His day job involves a camouflage tuxedo.)
Writing a novel is different than writing a short story. A short story can let the reader draw their own conclusions about why things happened, or how the plot ends.
Starting the novel was pretty similar to writing a short story. But then I had to keep the momentum going. I'm 14k words into the book and it seems to be going well.
A backstory involving the sleuth and her high school sweetheart tempers the main story line and helps provide some romantic comedy balance to the serious main plot.
It's Bound to be a Squash-buckling Good Time
Because the murder takes place during Blackbeard Days, there are some puns starting with the title of the book itself.
Those who "win" NaNoWriMo will have written 50k words in 30 days. This is the push many people need to get their novel off the ground. I've been kicking this one around since August when I traveled to Baltimore, Maryland to pick up Captain Jack, my crested gecko.
And now here's a look at the inspiration for the wannabee starlet. Enjoy, and afterward please leave your comments and questions in the area below. I'd love to discuss them with you!
P.S. Thanks very much to my pal Anthony for suggesting the term "squash-buckling" during one of our writing sessions.
Where do you get the ideas for your books?
It's something people ask writers all the time. The answers, in its most simplest form, is anywhere and everywhere. Most of the time ideas happen when we are not even looking for them.
From Mystery Lights to Short Story Collection
For example, on an early fall morning in 2013, I scrolled through my emails while waiting for my husband. He was undergoing physical therapy for a shoulder injury that ultimately ended his firefighter career.
One of those emails was a newsletter from The Moonlit Road, a website that tells "ghost stories, folktales, myths and legends from the dark backroads of the American South." This particular newsletter featured a story about the Brown Mountain Lights which led to this train of thought:
My paternal grandmother's maiden name was Brown.
Those Browns hailed from North Carolina.
What if this mountain was named for someone in that family?
What if the lights are ghost-related?
What if I wrote about it?
What if I wrote a story for each state in the Appalachians?
Sometimes the inspiration is much more literal, which is what happened to me just a couple of months ago. I was in Baltimore, Maryland to adopt a rescued gecko when I pulled over at a fast food restaurant to double check my GPS.
I noticed a zucchini vine trailing out from beneath the fence separating the parking lot from the residents next door. This sent the author neurons in my brain into overdrive. I wondered:
Who owns the zucchini who grow on the opposite side of the fence?
Is it the fast food company, because the gourds are on their property?
Is it the private residence, since the vine originated on their property?
What if someone entered a wayward zucchini in a contest and won?
What if the property owner lost the same contest because of it?
What if the deviant entrant wound up murdered as a result?
The next thing I knew, I was plotting out my next book: ONE SQUASHED VICTORY. It's my 2015 NaNoWriMo attempt. Follow Becky Muth Author Page on Facebook so you can keep keep up with my progress during the entire month of November.
If you're a reader, then I'm happy to answer your questions. And if you're a writer, then I'd love to hear where you find inspiration.
In the meantime check out this video about the Brown Mountain lights during a National Geographic shoot. Creepy isn't it?
On May 5, 2015 I found myself on the corner of Blind Faith Boulevard of Hope and Dreams Avenue. There I was, staring at the Bouchercon registration page. My information filled out, the only thing left was to hit the send button.
Flash forward five months and a few days. I found myself on the corner of Salisbury and Lenoir Streets in Raleigh, North Carolina. It was really happening. Not only had I drowned my social anxieties in enough Starbucks to float a pontoon boat, but I was also ready to mosey up to the Sheraton hotel to check in at the Bouchercon registration table.
The moment the volunteer handed me a swag bag filled with a wide range of mystery books, I was sold. Within a few minutes I found myself in the company of a couple of other Bouchercon newbies. Over the next few days I'd happily run into them again, making me feel more welcomed and included than I could have imagined.
If you're planning to attend Bouchercon 2016, here are some things you should consider:
Arrive and check in a day early, if you can. There was no line on that first morning, but I skipped anything scheduled before about 10 o'clock in the morning. I'm pretty sure I checked in smack dab in the middle of the Welcome to Bouchercon event, which would explain the lack of a crowd. Arriving a day early not only gives you a head start on checking in, but it also allows you to locate other essential locations, like the bathrooms and Starbucks.
Attend the Bouchercon 101 panel. Even though I won't be a newbie next year, I still hope to attend this panel as it's full of tips and advice specific to that particular venue, which is the Marriott on Canal Street in New Orleans.
Wear comfortable shoes and clothes. The dress ranged from very casual to business casual. Wear what is comfortable for you. I saw someone wearing a business suit and sneakers, and another person wearing a t-shirt, yoga pants and flip-flops. The fashion statements covered a wide range.
Take a refillable travel mug or sports bottle. The convention hosts do a great job of providing refreshments. During Bouchercon 2015, a few times during each day, hotel staff would bring snacks into the hospitality area. Coffee, water, and sometimes lemonade would remain available throughout the day. Take a travel mug or sports bottle that you can keep with you during panels.
Silence your phone. I can't stress this enough. Some of the rooms where panels were held had horrible acoustics. Sometimes the microphones didn't adequately amplify the speakers' voices. And in one case, the speaker's voice was naturally soft. A ringing cellphone is annoying under the best of circumstances. When other conditions apply, it's worse.
Take your business cards - especially if you're a writer or aspire to get published. I didn't take my cards the first day because I didn't want to look presumptuous. This was a huge mistake. Three people asked for my card - and I am pretty sure my path never crossed with two of them again. I met so many people, there's no way I could remember their names.
Brush up your knowledge of Who's Who at Bouchercon. I asked one person, "Are you a writer?" I mean, his name tag didn't say otherwise. Turns out he was nominated for an Anthony Award. Smooth! He was humble enough not to mention it, and fortunately I figured it out later that day. You don't have to know every author there, but you should at least know the Anthony Award nominees so you can wish them luck. (Next year I'm putting an alphabetized cheat sheet in my phone.)
I'd love to hear your tips for attending a writing event like Bouchercon. Let's chat about it in the comments below!
Writers are not normal. I know this because I am a writer and my family tells me all the time how abnormal I am compared to them.
I like to think I'm the normal one and they're weird, but whatever.
However when I get together with my writing group, it makes me realize that they might be onto something after all. Here are some common traits I see among members of my writing group as well as in other friends who are writers.
1. Writers always think about writing.
Whether it's a character in their book, an idea for a new book, or someone else's book, writers are always either jotting down or making mental notes about something writing-related.
2. Writers get really excited about writing.
If you really want to make a writer happy, then give them time, tools, and space to write. They will love you for it. My favorite gifts from my family include a journal covered in pink faux leather and a Doctor Who themed ink pen.
3. Writers get more emotional about writing.
They also get more emotional about reading, but that's a different blog post for a different day. Only my fellow writers understand when I tell them that I cried over something that happened to the characters in my book.
4. Writers surround themselves with writing.
This one is huge. My desk not only holds my laptop, but it also bears host to a pile of hotel scratch pads, a small milk pitcher full of various writing utensils, stacks of journals and notebooks, sticky notes, and a pile of books on topics ranging from romantic fiction to how to organize your next novel.
5. Writers enjoy talking about writing.
If you want to make friends with a writer, then ask them about their book. Really listen as they explain it to you. Better yet, read the things they write, regardless if it is their blog or their latest bestseller.
6. Writers often balance chaos.
Getting lost in your writing means being distracted from things that might otherwise need your attention. Writers are gluttons for slipping into "the zone" and forgetting to do things like eat lunch, stay hydrated, sleep, and so forth.
7. Writers don't give up.
Writers have terrific highs when things are going their way, and terrible lows when things don't work out so well. Regardless of how it's going, they don't give up.
Are you a writer? Do you agree with the list? I'd love to hear from you in the comments!
Last week I had the good fortune to attend the Doctor Who in 3D event, which featured the two-hour season finale from season eight, a preview of season nine, and Wil Wheaton's interview with Peter Capaldi and Jenna Coleman, aka Doctor Who and Clara, respectively.
During the interview my friend and fellow writer MK, from Project Ehmkay Ultra, was amused when I pulled out my trusty notebook and pen and started taking notes. She warned me that the best things from the interview would stay with me without taking notes, a tip she picked up from Stephen King.
At the time, I mentally argued that I'm ADD and would never remember these notes without writing them down. As it turns out, I should have at least looked at my notes when I got home - or better yet, written this blog post, because looking at my notes now...I have no idea what some of this means. For example:
Any abstraction of the human form is quite spooky.
Clara says I have attention deficit something-or-another.
Loss changes your perspective after you have nothing to lose.
You have to be committed without shutting out anyone else's ideas because their ideas might be better than yours.
Out of all of those ideas, only one makes sense - and I've never even met Clara! And as it turns out, I only have one note taking tip which is as soon as possible after jotting down the notes, sit down at your laptop or wherever and expand on them so you know why the heck you wrote the notes in the first place.
In the meantime, here's the Doctor Who Season 9 trailer. Are you a Whovian? Who's your favorite doctor or companion? Let's talk about it in the comments!
I want to build a blanket fort. It is not for my sons, who are aged 18 and 17 and entirely capable of building their own stereotypical manly blanket forts. I don't want to share it with my husband, because he thinks the idea is silly.
When I close my eyes and picture my perfect blanket fort, it has things like a chenille bedspread roof, fairy lights along the tie-dyed , a bean bag chair floor, a small bookshelf, and a maybe a goldfish bowl full of skittles.
Come on, everyone knows it's not logical to put a goldfish in a blanket fort.
But getting back to my point, everyone could use some time in a blanket fort. This is especially true if you are a writer, and here are three reasons why:
1. Relaxation
Going into a blanket fort transports you into another realm. All the stress from the world outside the blanket fort disappears. You don't have to look at your phone or laptop. You can read a book, take a nap, or just curl up and daydream about stuff.
2. Inspiration
All that daydreaming can lead to inspiration. One minute you're wondering why the unicorn is Scotland's national animal (Go on, look it up!), and the next your main character butts in with a thought. Then another character pipes up. Before you know it, the ideas are flowing like crazy.
3. Socialization
Can you imagine having your next writers' group meeting in a blanket fort? Put away your notebooks, pens, and laptops in favor of a board game like Boggle or, my favorite, Scrabble! As soon as you tell your friends and family you have a blanket fort, they will beat down the fabric door to join you. (If they don't try to have you diagnosed with Peter Pan Syndrome.)
So who's ready to build a blanket fort? If you aren't sure where to start, then check out the following YouTube video.
I'd love to hear your thoughts (or see the results of your fort-building) in the comments below!
This is my first attempt at the NYC Midnight Short Story Challenge. The story had to be less than 1,000 words with the following conditions:
Genre - Romance
Location - Aquarium
Random Item - Jalapeno Pepper
Thanks for reading, and I look forward to your comments!
"Birds of a Feather"
Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at quarter-past twelve, Archibald Monroe took a seat inside an auditorium at the aquarium next door to the bank where he worked as a loan officer. The Birds of the Rainforest show was his favorite exhibit and in the past seven weeks, he hadn’t missed a single performance. The show began promptly at 12:40 p.m. but arriving early gave him time to scarf down his lunch – a cardboard container of jalapeno poppers from a food truck parked outside the glass and steel structure.
Archibald preferred the exotic birds over the mysterious sea creatures within the multi-story building, but thought none of them compared to their handler, Deirdre Carlin. Her pouty lips, dark lashes, and mane of glossy, auburn hair captivated him, but he was most impressed with her well-toned physique. She looked the picture of health.
Unlike Vera. Vera also worked at the bank next door. Every day at lunchtime, she and Archibald shared a rickety table in the breakroom. He asked her out over its faded, laminate top. When Vera shared the news of her cancer diagnosis while sitting across from him at the same table, he half-heartedly promised to be there for her.
But that was before he drove her home from her first chemo treatment and she puked all over the inside of his Mercedes. The next day he sent her a dozen roses and a copy of the receipt for the auto detailing service responsible for cleaning the mess.
Archibald avoided the breakroom afterward, which was how he wound up visiting the bird show at the aquarium. He since went out of his way to avoid Vera at work and hadn’t returned to his former lunch venue. Not even when the bank manager mass-emailed the employees to congratulate Vera on the news of her cancer going into remission. He couldn’t risk getting emotionally close to someone that sick.
Right on time in the auditorium, the lights dimmed over the audience and spotlights illuminated the stage. Archibald devoured the last of the deep fried jalapenos, stuffed the container into the pocket of his jacket, and licked his fingers clean.
Twenty-five minutes later, after the meager midday crowd dispersed, Archibald practically bounced to the front of the stage. “Hi Deirdre! Are we still on for tonight?”
“Of course! I wouldn’t miss it.” Deirdre’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and her bottom lip quivered. “I look forward to something to make me smile after…well.” During the show she mentioned the passing of Bryan, her scarlet macaw.
“Yeah. Sorry to hear it. You think you’ll find a replacement soon?”
She glanced up and held his gaze. “Oh yes, quite soon. I have my eye on one which should work out nicely.”
“Great! Still want me to pick you up at your apartment?” Archibald’s smile broadened, dimpling his cheeks when she confirmed her address so he could plug it into his phone.
***
“Losing someone you love is hard.” Archibald covered Deirdre’s hand with his. They sat at the kitchen table in her apartment, empty plates all that remained of the dinner she prepared – steak, baked potatoes, and his favorites, jalapeno poppers.
She gave a deep sigh. “A macaw can live as long as a human. He should have lasted another forty years at least. Did you know they mate for life?”
“I had no idea.” Archibald leaned forward, enchanted by his hostess.
“They do.” She nodded, pulling her hand away. “And they aren’t likely to leave their mate for someone younger and sexier.”
“Did someone leave you?” When Deirdre didn’t answer, he pressed, “What common excuse for a human would leave you? I hope you don’t mind my saying, but you’re the prettiest woman I ever met. I’d certainly never leave you.”
A flush crept into Deirdre’s cheeks and she stood, clearing the dishes away from dinner. Archibald sat back and watched, his eyes taking in her form as she moved.
“So what’s your story?” She asked while stacking the dishwasher. “Surely you weren’t always single.”
“I was dating someone from work, but it didn’t work out.”
“What happened?”
Archibald hesitated only slightly. “She needed time to focus on herself.”
“How very selfish! She must not have been the one.”
“No, no I don’t think she was. You’d think it wouldn’t be so hard, finding the right person to spend the rest of your life with.”
“I know exactly what you mean,” she agreed, turning on the dishwasher. Then she turned to her guest. “Would you join me in the living room? I have a new bottle of cognac waiting for a special occasion like tonight, if you’re up for a nightcap.” He readily agreed, her cologne luring him into the next room like a hummingbird to a fragrant flower.
***
A pounding headache woke Archibald from a deep sleep. He blinked his eyes open and looked around. What is this place? He thought. Jungle? Forest? Where am I?
Just then, Deirdre’s face came into focus. Archibald tried to speak, but his voice came out in a squawk. He looked down at the feathers covering his body and screamed.
“Shh, it’s okay precious Archie.” Her fingers delicately ran over his head and down his back, causing him to shiver. She carefully removed him from the enclosure. “You’re right. It’s difficult to find the one person to share the rest of your life. When you kept appearing in the audience, I knew you were the one for me.”
Archibald stared at his date from the previous night, too shocked to speak, much less squawk.
“And now you’ve replaced Bryan, so we can spend the rest of our lives together! I love you so much, Archie. We’re going to be so happy together.”
Deirdre stepped onto the stage and waved at her audience. “Welcome to Birds of the Rainforest! Today I’d like to introduce you all to Archie, a blue and gold macaw.”
We are a society in love with technology. Age no longer matters when it comes to having a cell phone on hand. Or more accurately, glued to the hand. I'm guilty of it, but I try to be discreet when having an actual voice conversation.
Other people act like discretion is a foreign concept. While this is sometimes an annoyance, other times it makes great inspiration for books. This is especially true if a second party shows up and you can hear both parties speaking.
Recently I had the good fortune of finding myself in this exact situation several weeks ago. Parked at a coffee shop with my laptop for a few hours, the gentleman next to me seemed rather surprised when an attractive female showed up. Here's their conversation*, per my live-share with some friends on Skype.
Jack: What are you doing here?
Diane: I just wanted to surprise you.
Jack: But what...are you doing...HERE?
Diane: I told you (kisses him) I wanted to surprise you.
Jack: (still in his seat) Um...
Diane: Are you surprised?
Jack: You could call it that.
Diane: (shoves forward and kisses him on the mouth) Be right back, I need coffee!
Jack: (furiously texting someone)
Diane: Are you available?
Jack: Not really, no (furiously packing up laptop)
Diane: (sits down)
Jack: Did you park by me?
Diane: YEP! (very happily) I knew by the dry cleaning in the back.
Jack: Oh.
Diane: It was a dead giveaway.
Jack: I miss ironing. I should iron my shirts more.
Diane: How's Marybeth?
Jack: She's good, showing. Everyone's asking when she's due.
He just got up. She got up. She's following him outside.
You don't have to be a writer to speculate where this might lead. My group of friends on Skype enjoyed speculating - was she an ex-girlfriend? A former co-worker? A kissing cousin? A current lover? A super friendly person with no respect for personal space or social cues?
How might you spin this story? I'd love to hear about it in the comments, along with anything else you'd like to discuss. And in the meantime, here's a video where someone finds another fun use for eavesdropping.
Until next week, happy writing!
*Names changed to protect identities, should they ever read this blog article.
In a nutshell, people sign up through the 100 Happy Days website and commit to posting something happy-related online via their social media accounts for 100 days in a row.
How Can People not Have Time to Be Happy?
How hard could it be? It takes only a few seconds to write up a social media post and add a hashtag. Apparently it is rather difficult. According to the website:
71% of people tried to complete this challenge, but failed quoting lack of time as the main reason. These people simpy [sic] did not have time to be happy. Do you?
What losers! Honestly, who doesn't have time to post something happy to social media? There are more people using social media than ever before.
According to a new eMarketer report, “Worldwide Social Network Users: 2013 Forecast and Comparative Estimates,” nearly one in four people worldwide will use social networks in 2013. The number of social network users around the world will rise from 1.47 billion in 2012 to 1.73 billion this year, an 18% increase. (Jun 18, 2013)
Am I too Busy to Be Happy?
Having nothing to lose, I threw my hat into the #OneHundredHappyDays ring and hit the ground running. I had so much to be happy about! But then I forgot to post one day. Then I missed another day. Then I missed a few days in a row -- despite being on social media every flipping day!
How did this happen? Was I one of the 71% who were too busy to be happy? Or was it something else? Something like:
having two teenagers, a husband, four dogs, a pair of geckos, and a turtle who demand my time and attention
working an average of 11.5 hour days between freelance writing, my writing projects, and our family's business
being distracted by all the other crap cluttering my news feed on every one of those social media accounts
Ding Ding Ding! We Have a Winner!
I'm not too busy to be happy at all. I'm just too distracted to brag about it. I fire up social media and ADD kicks in full force. What started off as an intention to share a bit of happiness turns into my community's group page, news feed, BuzzFeed, trending news, CollegeHumor, dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena!
Between the junk in our newsfeeds and networks like Facebook making it more difficult to follow the people and organizations that matter to us, is it any wonder that I (along with 71% of the others who signed up for the challenge) failed to create #OneHundredHappyDays?
100 Happy Days? Challenge Denied!
I love a good challenge, so I think someday I'll try again. Not right now, though. Right now I have more important things to do, like watch a movie with my family or research something for my next book.
Have you ever tried the challenge? Did you succeed? Or were you too busy or distracted to keep up with posting for one hundred days in a row? I'd love to hear about your experience (as well as the things that make you happy) in the comments below!
OMG is right. Have you seen this? Someone butchered classic works of literature. I'm talking timeless treasures from the Lord Bard himself, William Shakespeare.
Juliet: Srsly U R so hawt.
Romeo: IKR?
However, this is not the first time someone has altered a Shakespearean work. Let us review:
While the above works were inspired by Shakespeare, they all retain a certain amount of literary integrity. They respect basic elements of literature such as spelling and grammar. The OMG series, on the other hand, fails to do that. Here's an example of what you can expect from OMG Shakespeare:
So what do you think? Are the "greatest stories ever told from the greatest playwright of all time in emoji" an innovative attempt to gain popularity with the current generation of teenagers? Or are they just idiotic?
After a failed wake-up call from the front lobby, I grabbed a couple of strips of bacon from the hotel's complimentary breakfast area. Fortunately I'd packed everything up the night before as the first event on the final day was scheduled early in the morning and we wouldn't have a chance to get back to the hotel before checkout time.
Don't Be Afraid to Change Your Mind
Although we missed the opening remarks from the MAFWI representative, each person in our group made it to their respective breakout sessions. I originally planned to attend the following breakout session:
Demons, Angels, Ghosts, and Monsters: The Fantastic World of Paranormal Fiction
The breakout session offered insight from three presenters, including:
I got as far as the front door of the building, turned around, and took a seat on the half-wall spanning the length of the sidewalk. The previous day's conversation with Jim Rada kept coming back to me. In the next building over, he was leading a different breakout session:
Pirates, Gunfighters and Jack the Ripper: How to Write Historical Fiction
At the time I was on the cusp of finishing the final chapter of my book, HAUNTED WOMEN OF THE APPALACHIANS, a collection of 13 fictional short stories inspired by actual folklore. I soon made up my mind, and five minutes after the class started, I entered the historical fiction breakout session and took a seat in the back.
Over the next 90-ish minutes I learned so much. It answered questions like:
What is a historical novel?
Is historical fiction right for you?
Is it history or historical fiction?
More importantly, I got to ask Jim Rada questions I had about my book. He offered some great advice that helped me get the final chapter into the hands of my editor before a final deadline that marked the beginning of her autumn sabbatical. I shudder to think what might have happened if I hadn't attended this session.
Wrapping Up the End of a Great Weekend
After the morning breakout sessions, we congregated in the auditorium again for a panel discussion titled Marketing, Branding, and Social Media, Oh My! with:
Following the panel, we visited with authors, both the ones offering book signings and the ones just mingling around. Everyone in our group connected to new people, whether it was a presenter or another attendee.
And that wraps up my weekend at #MAFWI15. I loved every minute of it, and cannot wait to attend my next conference. Thanks to everyone who made this a fabulous weekend!
___________________________________________________________
This is the final installment in a three-part series. If you missed the first two articles, then you can find them here:
On the second day of the conference, the schedule was:
Keynote Speaker - Tess Gerritsen, "I've Got a Great Idea for a Book...Or Do I?" Maybe you think you have the perfect premise for a novel. But is it, really? How do you recognize when you've got an idea that will translate into a killer plot? Join international bestselling author Tess Gerritsen as she shares her experience and insights.
Morning Breakout Sessions- Why Every Writer Should Collaborate- The Importance and Purpose of Dialogue - Social Media Basics: How to Get a Grip on Your Social Media Campaigns - Writing Emergency Room Scenarios
Lunch Lunch was a buffet-style meal of salad ingredients including grilled chicken, a wide range of non-alcoholic drink choices, and a few dessert items, like watermelon and cookies
Panel Discussion The Details of the Dream: Worldbuilding for Writers of Fiction, Fantasy, and Everything in Between
Afternoon Breakout Sessions - Jumping into the Self-Publishing Pool - The Prince and the Pauper: The Real Deal Behind an Ideal Publisher-Author Relationship - Why Character Consequence and Reaction are Necessary for Conflict and Tension - Deviant Diagnosis: Creating Characters with Psychological Conditions -So You Want to Write a Thriller
Dinner
Open Mic
As with any event, there were parts I loved and also parts I did not like at all. Let's get the negative out of the way first.
Even though I understand the reason for it, the morning keynote building (which had the auditorium) and the lunch session building (which had the cafeteria) were spread out across campus. The emergency room themed session was also in the lunch building, due to having a room with some of the medical equipment being discussed.
The walk sucked. It was partly my fault. I'm not athletic. It was a hot day out. I wore a dark-colored shirt. Going toward the lunch building, I took my time and plenty of breaks. All in all it took about half an hour. (Did I mention plenty of breaks?)
On the way back it was all uphill. I left ahead of my friends but they quickly caught and passed me. Fortunately one of them offered to give me a ride in their vehicle, or I might still be making that walk right now.
Everything I Loved about Day Two
There may not be enough room in this article for me to list everything I loved.
Tess Gerritsen is not only a gifted author, but also a gifted speaker. I could have listened to her the entire day.
Because I skipped the morning breakout session and found a seat in the empty cafeteria just over an hour early, I was able to chat with both Jim Rada and Robert Bidinotto. This was a real boon, as it led to me switching breakout sessions for the following morning. (More on that in next week's article!)
During the in-between times the conference staff offered plenty of bottled water, granola bars, and other snacks. The bottled water was a real plus, and I for one really appreciated it.
The afternoon breakout session with Nik Korpon regarding analyzing characters who suffer from (and revel in) various psychological conditions. We talked about fictional characters in a wide range of media types, from Norman Bates to Walter White.
Get Your Work Out There Any Way You Can
Wrapping up the end of the evening was the Open Mic event. I surprised the other members of my group (and myself) by volunteering to read a short story. It was something I submitted to Morning Rain Publishing's contest, the 2014 Freaky Flash Award. Because the story, titled The Funeral Home is No Place For a Child, won first place, I thought I probably couldn't go wrong.
The entire time I stood in front of my peers of writers, it was a struggle. I could hear my voice shaking. Was I talking too fast? Were my words comprehensible? Where others had printed copies or a laptop handy, I'd copied and pasted the story from MRP's website into an email on my laptop minutes before the start of the event and then read it via the minuscule screen on my phone.
And then I was finished. With a big sigh of relief, I returned to my seat just glad it was over, never to be spoken of again. Except it was. A few people came up to me after the open mic and said how much they really enjoyed they story - especially the twist at the end. The next morning, even more attendees -- and even a couple of the presenters -- stopped to compliment me on the story.
And I'll wrap up my MAFWI 2015 review next week, rounding out my thoughts about the final day.
I always loved the idea of going to a conference or convention and this year I finally took the opportunity to attend the Mid-Atlantic Fiction Writing Institute's annual conference, formerly known as the Nora Roberts Writing Institute at Hagerstown Community College.
Along with panel discussions, #MAFWI15 offered breakout sessions and workshops. These mini-events held themes ranging from how to write scenes that take place in the emergency room to tips for self-publishing. When I saw that a friend from my writing group was on one of the panels, I jumped at the chance to attend.
After treating my husband to his birthday lunch, I abandoned him and met up with members of our local writing group, The Mountain Scribes. The group, which is invitation only and limited to less than a dozen members, meets bi-weekly but this was the first time several of us would attend an event of this size.
#MAFWI15 Kickoff
I met up with Julie at the hotel. Like myself, Julie is also a professional blogger who dabbles in literary fiction. Soon after, we were joined by MK Rath, an urban fantasy author from our local, invitation-only writing group.
After dinner and drinks, because nothing cures my anxiety like a frozen, salted margarita, we attended the meet-and-greet where we touched base with fellow Mountain Scribe Alicia Drumgoole (aka Agnes Jayne), who was a presenter at the conference. Alicia introduced us to her childhood friend and fellow author, Kendra Leigh Castle. The discussion was light and fun, and the perfect way to kick off the evening.
Attend All the Panel Discussions
From the meet and greet we transitioned into a banquet room for a panel discussion. If you have never attended one then I highly recommend it. Panel discussions offer multiple, sometimes diverse viewpoints on a topic. During one of the discussions a question I asked received four different answers, all of which had information I could use.
This particular panel discussion covered the topic of Getting Started and featured the following people:
Just like you can't tell a book by its cover, you also can't tell an author by their book jacket photo. No two authors in that panel answered any question exactly alike. If their answers were similar as to their process for writing their book, then they had different ways for getting inspired or editing.
Wrapping Up the Evening
Perhaps the best part of the night came after the panel. Alicia had given a shout out to The Mountain Scribes while boasting the merits of belonging to a writing group. Once the panel broke up, Julie, MK and I headed over to let Alicia know how much we enjoyed the discussion. Other writers hedged about, some being more talkative than others.
I'm not sure who said it during the evening, but they captured the feeling spot on with the comment: These are my people, my people who understand me and get it. The group eventually fizzled out and we returned to our respective hotel rooms with a 7:00 A.M. wake up call for the next day.
A few weeks ago I scheduled a wellness visit at with a herpetologist for Speedy, our Eastern Box Turtle. I was concerned that her beak was too long and that her nails might need a trim. At the advice of a turtle owners group on Facebook and a somewhat reputable YouTube video, I tried to file it down myself with an emery board, but Speedy wasn't on board with this concept at all.
Before the appointment, I psyched myself up for whatever news the doctor had to share, whether good or bad. Overall we are doing a fine job with Speedy, who is the right age, weight, coloring, and so forth. Speedy is very active.
Speedy's beak should not be filed, as it will work itself out in due time. (And if it doesn't, then we should bring Speedy back.) Filing it down with an emery board could give poor Speedy a migraine, so no wonder the attempt was ill-received.
And then we got the startling news. Speedy is a boy.
Sir Speedy, Teenage Ninja Turtle Extraordinaire
Apparently the red eyes are a huge giveaway. Another is the convex shape of the lower half of his shell. Somehow I managed to keep a straight face during the vet's hands-on demonstration of how the shape of the bottom half of a male turtle's shell might help during the mating season.
(Just...think about it. Right? It does explain why Speedy seemed to enjoy all those belly rubs I've given him over the past year. I mean, he really, really seemed to enjoy the attention...and now I know why.)
So there is my update on Speedy, our family's ninja turtle. It's good to know he wasn't PMSing after all, and that we've given him a safe, healthy, happy environment. May he enjoy many more decades with us, as turtles are apt to do.
For whatever reason, I never watched Gilmore Girls when it was on the air. I had a few friends who were rather obsessed with the show, but I never had any desire to watch it.
In early May, 2015 all that changed. My guys had tickets for a two-day concert at a venue near Baltimore, Maryland. While they spent two days and evenings listening to a myriad of musical acts, I was "stuck" at the hotel with my laptop. Because the hotel television had HDMI capabilities, I hooked straight into the set and fired up my laptop's dual screen technology feature. Within a few minutes, I was perusing Netflix for something to watch, and quickly settled on Gilmore Girls.
Hooked from the Start
The first episode hooked me. I could relate to Lorelai, the main character, and her disastrous relationship with her parents. I could relate to her passion for her career. I could relate to her having a close friend who was not only a baker, but also a redhead.
But one thing I could not relate to was her relationship with her daughter. I have two sons, and there is a less than 1% chance I will ever have a third child by natural means. Sure, I could foster or adopt a girl but to be perfectly honest, I'm happy with two kids.
The Perks of a Male Dominant Family
Having two boys means I can get family four-packs to concerts, amusement parks, and other special events. I can tag along with my boys to drop a pole in the water on a sunny afternoon, or I can sit home in the peace and quiet of our home with our quartet of canines while they rock out to their favorite bands.
Another perk of having two boys is they are almost completely out of the snarky teenager phase of life. At ages recently-turned-18 and darned-near-17, they are young men who almost always treat me with kindness and respect.
My boys may never desire to spend a day shopping with me, but they know how to order my favorite coffee, hold doors open for me, and refer to me as ma'am when it counts. I may never trade cosmetics tips with them or have them accompany me on a trip to the hair dresser, but I can count on them to take extra shifts of dog walking and provide extra hugs when I'm PMSing.
Hope for the Future
This is not only a show about mothers and daughters, but also about fathers and daughters, grandparents and daughters, close friendships, tight-knit communities, and so much more. Here's a video that shows a good example.
It's true I've never been a Gilmore Girl, but someday my boys may bring home a female significant other. There's still hope that I'll be a Gilmore Girl yet. I'm not in any hurry for it to happen, but I do look forward to it. Whenever that day comes, I will happily introduce them to Lorelai, Rory, Emily, Sookie Saint James, Paris, and all the rest of the cast.
They say authors are their own worst critics. I have found this to be true, not only when it comes to an author critiquing his or her own work, but also when receiving critiques about our work from others -- even if those others are people close to us.
My writing group takes turns critiquing each others' submissions on a regular basis. The submission might be a piece of flash fiction, or it could be a fraction of a larger work, such as my novel-in-progress titled HAUNTED WOMEN OF THE APPALACHIANS.
Critiquing versus Editing
There is a definite line between critiquing and editing. The members of my group not only have different writing styles and genres, but we also have different methods of critiquing each others' works. This is not a bad thing. In fact, it is kind of an awesome thing.
When submitting something, we have the option to put a notation at the top clearly stating what we're looking for in the critique. It might be something like:
I'm looking for egregious errors only.
Everything from plot holes to pronoun choices.
I need help with character development.
I'd like feedback on my scene transitions.
You get the idea, and for the most part this system is pretty flawless. If there is no notation, then the person reading it critiques in whatever style they are most comfortable.
However on one submission in the not-so-distant past, I forgot to put what I was looking for at the top. This piece was already in the hands of my editor. What I really wanted was a general overview, but I didn't say that. I didn't say anything.
So what I got from one member of our group was an in-depth critique. It was completely different from my style of critiquing and bordered on editing. Upon first glance, I did not take it well.
What? No! That's not How it Works!
Thoughts like It's not what I wanted at all! and How could this person edit my work? It's mine! ran through my head as I glanced over the comments, each one neatly organized in its own little speech bubble. If I took all the suggestions, it would require me to change a lot of things, and I kind of don't do well with change.
Here's a confession: I didn't even read through them all on the first time around. About halfway through the digital document, I closed it out with plans to revisit it later. The only mention I made of it during our meeting was a request not to edit my work or remove words and phrases, but to strike through or highlight them so I have a clear reference when reading through the comments.
I couldn't say anything else. There was just too much to digest. When it comes to my writing, I am tenderhearted. My skin is thin as rice paper. These words I put together are like little bits of my soul. To paraphrase a metaphor from Julie, a friend, home school mom and fellow writer, "When I put my pen to the page, I bleed." In other words, regardless whether it is literary fiction, non-fiction, or science fiction, we authors put a lot into our work.
Revisiting the Critique
A few days later, armed with a Caramel Ribbon Crunch Frappuccino, I went back and read through the comments again. A lot of the comments brought up good points, such as talking more about the floor plan of the setting to give readers a clearer picture. There were still a few I disagreed with, but this time I didn't beat myself up over them.
Looking back, I am so glad I didn't allow my emotions to run my mouth at the meeting. I probably would have hurt someone who I consider a friend.
It was easy to see, after a few days went by, the critique itself wasn't what bothered me. It was my reaction to it. I took the comments way too personal. They weren't an attack on my writing. They were just comments from one person's point of view.
I'm not alone, though. A lot of artists are quite passionate about their work, from painters, to musicians, to writers, to actors, and everyone in between. Even Lucy Lawless (aka Xena, Warrior Princess) isn't immune to critiques as you can see from this video of her teaming up with Kenny Loggins to turn his hit Footloose into a duet.
As authors, we are not going to please all of the people all of the time. Not everyone will love the things we write. Some of you might be critiquing this blog post as you read it, and that's okay. (And if you do, please leave a comment below so we can talk about it...in a couple of days. Heh.)
Less Self-Criticism and More Investment
I'm not suggesting we stop critiquing our own works, but that we stop being so critical of ourselves. Instead of writing for other people, write for just one person -- you. At the end of the day, you are the person who has to live with the words, phrases, sentences, stories, chapters, and novels you publish for an audience, whether it is a social media status update or New York Times bestseller.
Other people can decide whether or not to invest in your work, but your investment in your work grows whenever you spend time on it. The time you spend beating yourself up because you don't like what one person has to say during a single moment can be spent doing something more productive, like fixing plot holes.
We need to weather all critiques, both positive and negative ones. In a way it prepares us for the future, when readers publicly review our works on sites like Goodreads and Amazon. There's a blog article by Mary Bue MacLean titled "Thoughts on Success, Failure & Non-Attachment" which explores the concept of recovering from a setback and includes a short, helpful video on the topic.
Let's Chat about Critiquing!
Have you ever received a critique or review of your writing that made you cringe? How did you handle it? I'd love to discuss this in the comments section below!
After urging from several friends, I signed up for MasterClass where James Patterson teaches how to write a bestselling novel. The timing is perfect as I just finished writing my first novel.
Because it was a series of short stories and my second book is my first full length novel, I need all the help I can get. Enter James Patterson, a bestselling author with a track record like no other. But he didn't start out that way. Every short story he ever submitted got rejected, and his first book was rejected 31 times before being published.
Talk about a ray of hope! A couple of weeks ago a woke up earlier than anyone else in my house -- even the dogs. With coffee in hand, I settled in at my desk, fired up the MasterClass webpage and logged in through my Facebook account.
A string quartet kicks off the introductory video, its briskly ushering you into the virtual classroom. It hearkens to the first day of school, when masses funneled into the auditorium doors where they sat en masse to hear the principal talk about goals for the new year.
"Hi. I'm Stephen King."
This is the first line of James Patterson's Master Class. Aside from using a different name, it's the same voice you hear on commercials. Hi. I'm James Patterson. He uses this technique to illustrate the importance of first lines.
James Patterson then segues into what he hopes people will achieve by taking the course. He explains who those people are, and what he can offer to them without wasting a lot of time with unnecessary details. He discusses some of the specific things he'll discuss in the course, from characters to marketing.
From there James Patterson shares some details about his journey from struggling writer to published author. His driving point is this: you aren't in this alone. He's been where you are right now, and even if you don't get published, then it's just part of your journey.
Where are you on your journey? Are you a writer? A reader? Something else? I'd love to talk to you about it in the comments area.
This is Speedy. She is an Eastern Box Turtle. Our neighbors found her in 2011 when she was about the size of an American silver dollar coin and domesticated her. Her shell is now slightly smaller than a softball.
During the summer of 2013, our neighbors were relocating to another area of the United States. They asked if my family could hang onto Speedy until they got settled. Long story short, by the time they were settled there, Speedy was settled here and we all agreed that she could stay with me indefinitely.
Speedy has a very good life, for a turtle. We upgraded her previous tank to one that measures 40 gallons, practically doubling the size of her habitat. In her tank she has:
Wood shred perfect for burrowing
A wading pool just large enough for soaking
Wood hiding hut custom built from reclaimed wood
Half a hollow log for climbing and hiding
Replica slate used as a feeding dish
Two different types of cuttle bone
I thought we were doing okay, but then Speedy went through a bit of a funk. She hunkered down in her hut for days at a time. Her tank is right next to my work space so she and I spent quite a bit of time together. During her funk, I barely saw her.
Finally I placed a frantic call to the nearest reptile vet. After several days of phone tag, I eventually got a live person on the phone and explained the situation -- about my turtle, who is a reptile. A vet tech called back and asked for more information regarding my bird. I don't even have a bird.
By this time, Speedy was back to her old self. I joined a group on Facebook and got a little advice. One repeated comment to the picture above was that her beak is overgrown and needs a trim. Because there's no other reptile vet in the area, it looks like I'll be tackling that myself.
I'm just glad the poor thing doesn't have PMS!
Like all the interesting things that happen in my life, Speedy is someday destined to make it into one of my books. Do you have any interesting pets? Are you a writer who gets inspiration from animals? Please share about it in the comments. I'd love to hear from you!
Everyone has a dirty little secret. Mine is that I play D&D. That's right -- Dungeons and Dragons. I first started playing during my freshman year of college when an old boyfriend said, "But girls don't play D&D." Well of course I had to try after that.
What I initially took to be a game of nerds sitting around a card table for an excuse to swill noxious green soda and nosh on orange-dusted tortilla chips turned out to be one of the best things in my life. It's led me to solid friendships with some great people.
Even better, playing D&D helped kick start my writing career. Playing D&D with a group around my dining room table led to playing text-based roleplaying games (RPGs) online. Because the games are text-based, there is a lot of reading, and even more writing.
One game even has a quarterly writing contest where fanfiction can win you big prizes, like ginormous amounts of in-game credits worth several hundred USDs which you can use to buy exclusive items for your character.
Writing fanfiction about a game led to writing blog articles for the game's website. It's what I was doing when I made the decision to sign up for Elance.
Every morning while waiting for coffee to seep its way into my veins I check out Facebook. This quiz recently caught my eye and, being a gamer from way back, I could not help but check it out. Typically I play a halfling bard so I was pretty pleased at the results (listed below).
What's your dirty little secret when it comes to things that inspire you? I showed you mine. Now I'd love it if you showed me yours in the comments section. Your secret's safe with me!
Alignment: Neutral Good A neutral good character does the best that a good person can do. He is devoted to helping others. He works with kings and magistrates but does not feel beholden to them. Neutral good is the best alignment you can be because it means doing what is good without bias for or against order. However, neutral good can be a dangerous alignment when it advances mediocrity by limiting the actions of the truly capable.
Race: Elves are known for their poetry, song, and magical arts, but when danger threatens they show great skill with weapons and strategy. Elves can live to be over 700 years old and, by human standards, are slow to make friends and enemies, and even slower to forget them. Elves are slim and stand 4.5 to 5.5 feet tall. They have no facial or body hair, prefer comfortable clothes, and possess unearthly grace. Many others races find them hauntingly beautiful.
Class: Clerics act as intermediaries between the earthly and the divine (or infernal) worlds. A good cleric helps those in need, while an evil cleric seeks to spread his patron's vision of evil across the world. All clerics can heal wounds and bring people back from the brink of death, and powerful clerics can even raise the dead. Likewise, all clerics have authority over undead creatures, and they can turn away or even destroy these creatures. Clerics are trained in the use of simple weapons, and can use all forms of armor and shields without penalty, since armor does not interfere with the casting of divine spells. In addition to his normal complement of spells, every cleric chooses to focus on two of his deity's domains. These domains grants the cleric special powers, and give him access to spells that he might otherwise never learn. A cleric's Wisdom score should be high, since this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
How did I become a writer? It wasn't hard. I was practically born writing.
One of my first memories is having a pencil gripped in my hand. I was sitting on my granddaddy's lap at his kitchen table, and he was teaching me how to "draw the letters" of my name. He also taught me how to draw 3-D boxes and stick figures. Storytelling followed, and throughout my education I found myself drawn to any classes that encouraged writing.
After years of trying all the wrong career choices, I finally landed a writing-related job, freelancing as a ghostwriter for a video game company. They paid with in-game credits which I in turn sold to other players for cold, hard cash.
In the fall of 2011, two things happened. The first was receiving a box from my late Granny's estate of things she wanted me to have. One of those things was a copy of my high school literary journal, which I'd given her during my senior year.
The second thing was that I saved up enough money from my writing gigs to take my family on an off-season vacation with a view of the Atlantic Ocean. The apparent message from the beyond coupled with my new confidence in my ability to make money at writing caused me to take my talents more seriously than ever before.
On January 2, 2012 I signed up for Elance, an outsourcing company. It took almost two solid months of submitting proposals to jobs before someone took a chance on me, a new writer with no reviews to her name. Once those initial 5-star reviews became available, I was blessed to get hired by a long-term client who threw a lot of work my way. In fact, I still write for that client!
The decision to work full-time as a writer changed my life for the better. I can't imagine doing anything else!
Check in next week when I share my #DirtyLittleSecret about something else that inspired me to take on a full-time writing career.
